Hey. Can we talk?
You seem to avoid conflict. It looks like you're lonely - even if you have friends or are in a relationship. I notice you're more comfortable talking about logistics and details - but not so much if talk turns to feelings.
But your emotions are the most valuable part of who you are! They're like the signature of your true self.
Plus they're essential for good friendship, parenting, and love.
So what if you struggle with emotions? What if you often feel kind of ... nothing inside. Sort of empty. Distant from other people.
I'm going to say: I don't think there's something wrong with you. Other than you probably struggle with emotional neglect. That's just a basic difficulty with emotional skills - to do with feelings, and recognizing them. Knowing what they are, how they feel in your body, and being able to talk about them with others - yours and theirs.
And it usually comes from the way you were raised. Parents have to grow emotions in their kids.
Emotional neglect is a curious thing because you can't always point to something that happened to you. It's more often the case of something that didn't happen for you. But should have. What didn't happen is that you weren't raised in an environment where emotions were noticed or mattered. No one was tuned in or asked how you were doing. There were no ordinary conversations about feelings. You weren't allowed to express your needs. Or burden your parents. (They might have been great people - but they weren't fluent in the language of emotions so they didn't know how to notice yours.)
The great news is, you have noticed. When you wonder why you're not happier. Or why other people seem to be.
The best news of all? You can fix this! Emotional skills are just that: skills. Which means something you can learn. It's never too late. And everyone can learn them. We're all born with emotional intelligence.
Recovering your emotions is the key. They're what connects you to your true self, and to other people. They're the language that makes life and relationships rich and meaningful.
Having access to your emotions is energizing and inspiring. (And why therapists enjoy their work so much - we loooove talking about how you feel!)
Don't keep wondering if there's something wrong with you. There's not.
(To read more, check out Jonice Webb's book Running on Empty.)